How to charge 10 bucks for a bottle of grape juice: sell it as “alcohol-free wine” 🤦🏻‍♂️ https://t.co/QqVFaFM878

RT @ubuntu: Ubuntu 22.10 is now available to download and install. Upgrade now: https://t.co/BvYLmObfsI https://t.co/QWwgJBnBNH

@El_Chaco_Veloz Zenón? 🤔

@El_Chaco_Veloz Zemo, no Zuma :) https://t.co/drJtGbpKA4

@mstfacmly @Communauto Reload every 5 seconds you’ll get one eventually. Just when you see an available one DO NOT HESITATE. I know 😓

Airline food: promise and reality 🌯 https://t.co/vT7uQwxjR6

@AirCanada I literally want to give you money to change seats but your web page does not work, you have stopped answering the phones, and emails take “up to 30 days” to be processed. Honestly, you need to do better.

@silicongirl For gender inclusivity you should use “They-people” 😑

@El_Chaco_Veloz But Chaco si le hacen eso no se va a espantar más? 😱💥🤣

Airlines received billions in pandemic bailouts, then charged exorbitant prices when travel restarted; knowing *in advance* what the demand was going to be like they didn’t plan for it and now have the gall to pull crap like https://t.co/oFRlRxkOCw.

@El_Chaco_Veloz También acá en el verdadero norte ;) https://t.co/r39z8gbBAh

No we don’t 🤣 https://t.co/1ugSCfur1c

@belairdirect your unsubscribe form is CONVENIENTLY having “technical difficulties”. Please fix it so I can unsubscribe from your #SPAM. https://t.co/RtlZCU92r8

https://t.co/8Ls07wYFPH

@El_Chaco_Veloz Lo siento Chaco yo nada más tengo el Mario Kart DS :(

RT @BicycleLobby: https://t.co/c2jQWoBKvy

@El_Chaco_Veloz Oops 🤭

@El_Chaco_Veloz A poco no le dura todo el día la pila? Ya cómprate una nueva, Chaco 💻

Isn’t it suspicious that the Legault government decided to condone the insurance portion of driver license renovations on an election year? Why didn’t they do it before, or after? Or not doing it and, I don’t know, use the money to improve pandemic measures. Just a thought. 🤷🏻‍♂️ https://t.co/Dz3KbC4Q3b

@Tonejito Y cartón. No se te olvide el cartón (tablarroca). 😜

So which is it ? https://t.co/ESlL8UJRDS or https://t.co/snk97ZV5hd ? Conflicting advice makes me fear they really have no idea.

@El_Chaco_Veloz Y la Cheyenne apá?

The queen’s gambit board game. Otherwise known as - chess 🙄 #marketing #fail https://t.co/n8naSWwest

Wow @twitter that’s some pro level text rendering right there. (Sarcasm) https://t.co/lKUtOBFYOF

Cameos of characters from other movies in 3d animation (the “pizza planet” truck in most Pixar movies, Sven the reindeer appearing in Moana) … they look clever but did you consider they’re merely reusing 3d models from their design libraries to make their work easier? 😜

@mstfacmly Pics!

@A_Aspuru_Guzik A tip: write canned responses for each type of request/rejection. You can customize them before sending, but having 80% already written really helps with time and the soul-sucking nature of repetitive replies. It works for me when dealing with support!

@El_Chaco_Veloz No es miércoles Chaco :(

jaja los servidores de correo del SAT están blacklisteados :) F=<buzontributario@sat.gob.mx> rejected RCPT <XXXX>: 200.33.74.91 is listed at https://t.co/h4gKoZlyvQ (127.0.0.3: https://www .spamhaus.org/sbl/query/SBLCSS)

@rollercoastrppl https://t.co/vqagF18OXR

Celebrando el 15 con una piñata de nyancat 🇲🇽🥳 https://t.co/hIT8bwEU4n

In the interest of inclusiveness, the “Advanced…” button in GUI settings dialogs should instead be named “Detailed…”. “Advanced” sends a “you’re too dumb to comprehend this” message to all your users, even the ones that do understand what they’re doing.

@El_Chaco_Veloz ?? Si tu certificado es de let’s encrypt a poco no usas certbot para que se acuerde y lo haga por ti? 🤪

Pandemic challenges, ordering food : - In a noisy food court - In not-your-native-language - With you and the clerk wearing masks - With a plexiglas barrier in between - And somehow managing to not screw up the order or miss anything. ✅ achievement unlocked ✅

Wow Twitter is atrocious for long-form content - yet people keep using it for that :(

@El_Chaco_Veloz Pos quien quiera que los hackeó es ahora dueño 🤪

@A_Aspuru_Guzik Welcome to Canada 🇨🇦 haha

@El_Chaco_Veloz Porque creen que estás usando “transparency mode” Chaco 😆

Very classy, ⁦@googledrive⁩ - it would be great if you could offer the default browser first, instead of two apps *i don’t even have * 🧐 https://t.co/cSzocAtTjK

What’s your “people you follow” / “people you have blocked” ratio on Twitter? Mine is 0.246 😬

@El_Chaco_Veloz Jaja si eso te sorprende mira aquí https://t.co/xGXPa52YWd

@bloodearnest @nottrobin The project is still public, send a PR and I’ll merge it :)

@El_Chaco_Veloz 🤔 Chevrolet trax la tiene del lado derecho. Mini Cooper, a la izquierda. Solo los que alcancé a ver en una cuadra 🤪

@El_Chaco_Veloz No 😎

Ah the irony. https://t.co/VzOExVZzjS

🤦🏻‍♂️ https://t.co/3BsIiTasTw

Overheard: “I am God!” 😎

@google_meet "this video is paused due to problems with your network" is beyond useless. What exactly is the problem with my network? it *is* working fine. The "troubleshooting" panel in the app concurs - system load and latency are fine. What's the problem? 🤷

Montreal - almost as cold as Houston, TX 🤪 https://t.co/bOfFCKNJJI

@El_Chaco_Veloz Pueden dar su discurso con la cartera y construirse una passive house 🥳https://t.co/mogad8n3e5

@El_Chaco_Veloz O sobornarlo! Dale un premio cuando se anime a poner una pata en la nieve y así poco a poco 😏

@El_Chaco_Veloz Esta acostumbrado, desde que tenia 11 meses anda en la nieve. Para ayudarlos: https://t.co/OuQn8i3cL1 y alguno de https://t.co/1NdiK8jDLo o https://t.co/IHhJNlmOxd

@El_Chaco_Veloz Bienvenido a Canadá 🥶

Rock & roll spider man ! https://t.co/2DjY5WX7Wb

Some top-notch promoted ad targeting, Twitter. Sure, sign me up for one, will make for a very fast commute. https://t.co/V9bLkG9LNb

@bloodearnest Microsoft.

#oobleck https://t.co/8lDXociwJJ

@El_Chaco_Veloz https://t.co/2XDx8otkqA

Very accurate ad targeting @YouTube - listerine ad. In Chinese, which we don’t speak here. https://t.co/ikpcsCMhH4

@nottrobin What has the pandemic man done to you? 😞😜

https://t.co/ycZ8fQ0Kxh curfew and non-essential businesses to shutdown, but schools to remain open? Almost sounds like our premier is using children as human shields 😒

@mstfacmly This is how Twitter is meant to be used! I switched away from the silly “Home” view as soon as they introduced it. Warning, Twitter will periodically change your setting and send you back to “Home” view. If your main view suddenly looks weird again, that’s why :)

Airlines - always looking after your health and best interests (NOT) https://t.co/di0XeJ3PTU

@El_Chaco_Veloz ¿Y su minivan, señora? 🤪

@El_Chaco_Veloz Por una vez te la maté jaja https://t.co/AEwa3aeSF8

@popmofolk Cuando uno muere, deja de vivir. Es como si uno falleciera. 😏

@El_Chaco_Veloz Ay pero está tan chirris que te cabría en un go kart 🤪🏎

@mstfacmly Bowser is not a dinosaur, maybe a turtle dragon 🐲

4:20 pm. It is night. 🌛

@El_Chaco_Veloz Wow del milenio pasado aparecen los documentos históricos del TEESA Protector!

Val Plante 2019: “we’re cancelling Halloween” François Legault 2020: “hold my beer” 🎄🚫

@cactitocdmx 💯🤪

🤤😋 https://t.co/LMwmex7sXk

@El_Chaco_Veloz Bonjour? 🤣

@mstfacmly Because I liked it 🤪

@mstfacmly You were searching for anime suggestions 🤗

@mstfacmly SAO? 🤔

Garage “la fleur” - we will remember you always 😭🌷

“Volcanic water” hahaha. It’s called “lava” and it’s probably not good for the skin ☄️

“El grito pusilánime “ 😆

@El_Chaco_Veloz Como crees chaco 😞

Evolution of Gatosaurio 😸🦖

https://t.co/a5evDxTsP0

@El_Chaco_Veloz Felicidades Chaco 🤩 (por la ciudadanía, no por el atracón de hot cakes jaja)

RT @GalacticFurball: convert -depth 8 yt_dl1.png rgb:yt_dl1.part convert -depth 8 yt_dl2.png rgb:yt_dl2.part cat yt_dl1.part yt_dl2.part >…

@nottrobin Being pedantic, the person from Mexico did say 6 hours. It can take a long time even if you don’t need to go to a special polling station 🧐

@mstfacmly Big fan of sarcasm here 😉

whois 213.142.148.33 Abuse to: info@hostingdunyam.com.tr This IP block is used for web hosting, of many many web sites. In case of a spam, please only deal with the exact originator IP only. DO NOT DEAL WITH THE WHOLE IP BLOCK

Well guess what. deals with whole block. LOL

Clicking on a link on Twitter is horrible because it goes through like 5 redirects and takes forever.

RT @mstfacmly: Case in point: https://t.co/FUiXy5lxCg

@arapulido Yes. Why isn’t this a twitter poll? 🤔

Back In august Legault directly opposed the federal Covid app (https://t.co/XBocB9LOlr) now he blames it on the “opposition parties” (https://t.co/6RYVFJj0N6). Which is it? The only clear thing is that he put us all in more danger for some petty nationalist politics.

@tartley Take a break if you must/ want but I highly recommend going into Legend of Korra while you have the world/events fresh in your mind!

Groceries for the week + arts & crafts materials = it all fits in the bike trailer with room to spare 💪🏻 https://t.co/E8mHkQGqiK

Pandemics are not the time to get on your nationalism high horse. We must use all tools at our disposal and by refusing to do so, this asshat was putting us all knowingly in danger. Just remember that next time you’re asked about his “performance”. https://t.co/YYWL09PiPn

@Tonejito master 🤪

@El_Chaco_Veloz “Tattoo” 🤣

Wow this is a new low for Gmail spam detection - signed up on a new device, the “new sign in notification” email which is sent from google to google was classified as SPAM by google. 🤣 or 😢? #EpicFailure

7:55 am perfect time to break a piñata 🎉

Replaced the motor in our @Baratza Encore grinder and it’s working like new again. The manufacturer sells the needed parts and provides full disassembly, diagnostics and replacement manuals. 💯 totally recommend 😁 https://t.co/bCfmnuVgdI

@mstfacmly Pics or it didn’t happen!

RT @gregmlarsen: @D22_soso @ronnychieng Ask yourself what Mario is doing that Bowser needs to take the princess away? We've only ever heard…

Se murió el Loco Valdés :/

I mean @YouTube - a 21-minute ad? LOL c’mon who’s gonna watch this. 🤣 *skip* https://t.co/QCp2py3mVy

@El_Chaco_Veloz https://t.co/vUHhB40Eh8

- YouTube viewers hate when we interrupt their videos with ads. What to do? - we can stop showing ads in the middle of the video... - no, I know! Let’s show an “ad coming in 5... 4... “ countdown so they are not taken by suspense! - ... 🤦🏻‍♂️

RT @n01s3: We are seeking an Engineering Manager to join our distributed/remote-first team at Canonical. Apply here https://t.co/PvCU3SGq1…

It’s only 7:45 am and I’m already on my second head reattachment of the day. #ToyLife https://t.co/py83tUfcbW

@El_Chaco_Veloz Chaco deja de ver series de Fox, solo las cancelan antes de tiempo y dejan a los fans chiflando en la loma (firefly, TTSCC, fringe, dollhouse). Te vas a ahorrar hartos corajes 👿

Thanks to Google’s crappy spam detection I now have two inboxes to check instead of just one. #YouHadOneJob

A couple of hours in the clamp and he’s all better now ! https://t.co/oV7s63qyZA

Arm in place, ready for glue https://t.co/uq8JBT0BDE

Measuring and cutting the replacement joint (brad nail) https://t.co/b5R2uNAMVp

Bowser shoulder replacement take two (he leads a rough life, busted his *other* arm) https://t.co/CsYJvKHQaa

“Tu decepcionante ñerez” 🤣👍🏻

@zygoon Hang in there! This too shall pass.

Shoulder replacement surgery for Bowser https://t.co/GY0Ky0YBbG

RT @silicongirl: Hey Montrealers, please sign! 💙 https://t.co/J3j3rAjQQQ

@El_Chaco_Veloz Si el correo se lo mandaste a su cuenta de outlook te vas a quedar esperando 😜

Garden friends https://t.co/loES91wMGt

Well @twitter - I click “see less often” every single time and you still show this at least once a day. I wonder how often you would spam me with this crap if I didn’t say I want to see it less often 🙄 https://t.co/SqVVAihO4W

Traducción de “OK” a español = “VALE”????????? 😨😓 https://t.co/Nxvc4O5wKd

Your phone is too big to fit in your pant pockets. 📱Do you get:

“Legault's approval ratings fall back to earth as Quebec tries to reopen” - easy to get 95% approval for a non-controversial “just stay home and you’ll be safe”. Much harder to achieve when reopening, which means managing actual risk, which means doing an actual politician’s job.

@popmofolk 🙋🏻‍♂️

@El_Chaco_Veloz 3? Estás chavo Chaco mi récord en un día son 9 😞

👀👀 https://t.co/Wb0d1m3I2F

Isolation, say 27: we are watching larva videos. #Covid_19 #speakingmoistly

“Who can see your future meat hook”? 🤔 #meaninglessTweets

@El_Chaco_Veloz 🤪 https://t.co/beuMRH24Vj

@El_Chaco_Veloz https://t.co/5suphjXWio

Si el problema es un virus, ¿por que usan gel anti bacterial? 🤔 https://t.co/TUe2rpSp97

@El_Chaco_Veloz En realidad es el límite de 1 por persona 😝 si no, seguiría vacío 🧻🚫

These days, keep a close eye on which companies are ready to help even at the expense of profits. And which are already eyeing government bailouts to sustain their failed business models. I’m looking at you, airlines and banks. #coronaCrooks https://t.co/AtEXdyHG7e

Gee I feel *so* reassured now that CEOs from 2 banks, 3 supermarkets, 2 mega stores, one cinema group and a chain of pharmacies sent me impersonal, mass emails letting me know they’re there for me. 🙄 #corporate

Dude if you’re upset about hand sanitizer or toilet paper price gouging you should see what airlines are charging to change/rebook flights. ✈️👎🏼 #crooks

The elbow 💪🏻 most underrated human joint, having its 15 minutes of fame because it turns out - you can use it for everything! Sneeze into it, greet others with it, can even do self-defense in a pinch while fighting for that last TP roll at the store. 🧻

How much does “rush hour” last in your town, per day? 🤔

@A_Aspuru_Guzik Remember In 2009 “The Mexican government closed most of Mexico City's public and private facilities in an attempt to contain the spread of the virus” https://t.co/7bV4Ndd5Mf

Some things in the world can’t be fixed. Some can be fixed with a strawberry 🤪 https://t.co/sfdCBtkmkN

@ELTONEJO https://t.co/2jcRtG5R57

How many faxes did you send in 2019? How many do you think you’ll send in 2020? 🤔📠 #fax

@popmofolk Ya se adaptaron 🙊 https://t.co/2ihrSCEegt

@popmofolk Es por los 29 de febrero de los años bisiestos (2012 y 2016) 🤓

“Montreal police has not enforced the bylaw since 2015.” - any bylaw that isn’t enforced in 6 months should automatically become invalid - selective enforcement is a form of oppression. https://t.co/YOqJ7JpQAm

@EvilSynths @stanpcgaming @Lord_Arse Your wait ended in 1987 https://t.co/YqmhwYuMK2

https://t.co/XmlWorzORn 🤦🏻‍♂️

@El_Chaco_Veloz Trabaja desde casa Chaco, y descansa del Doom un rato 🤣

@AmazonHelp hey so - my book arrived like this. I don’t want to go to the hassle of a return (it’s minor and just the sleeve of a hardcover book) but damn, please be more careful with stuff 🙄 order 702-5021217-3449015 if it matters https://t.co/TaeDY5Ewji

Baby Pumbaa or baby Yoda? 🤔 https://t.co/uuDoO9j8lO

“I ain’t scared of no ghost” 👻😎

This #GivingTuesday we're donating to animal welfare, nature conservation and to organizations that power the stuff we depend on daily for work and leisure, like @Wikimedia , @letsencrypt and @mozilla .

@popmofolk @silicongirl 🤪😂

@popmofolk @silicongirl 😒👎🏼

@popmofolk Es una válvula “presta”, necesitas una bomba o adaptador que le entre 😛

@zygoon I think it’s called Disney+ 😝

Blood has been spilled 🔪 https://t.co/biraCm0HeE

Yes we Canada! #dukeCaboom #WeTheNorth https://t.co/lOyIBOfNPe

Ed. Minister Roberge: “if she wants to avoid punishment, she also has the option to remove her hijab at work.” - what this asswipe minister fails to understand is that people’s identity is NOT an “option”. It’s who they are. https://t.co/qeAoGHb3JD

https://t.co/SHDCOJ2emr

A new generation of Thundercats fans 🗡🦁🐱🐯

Good rednecks 🤔 https://t.co/gBFoyLGXmh

"we use cookies to improve your experience" - but apparently you don't use them to store my acceptance of your use of cookies, and ask me about them every single time. 😤 now that would be a welcome improvement. #websitesSuck

Space goop 👽🛸

"Walmart is removing displays and signs of violent video games in its stores" - but I bet they will NOT stop selling or displaying actual guns. 🤦 #perfectemoji

“All we hear from Andrew Scheer is how he wants to do less to tackle climate change, when the science says we need to be doing more.” - keep in mind for October. https://t.co/jidRedGa0K

They are fighting against *your* rights. Think about that next time you’re considering buying tickets from them. https://t.co/WWzOIklhgG

Funny how when you sign up for a new site/service you start getting spam almost immediately but when you want to unsubscribe it's always "Oh, please allow 10 days for processing your request". It's a computer processing it, it should be instantaneous.

@mstfacmly Congrats on the new job!! 🙌🏻

@GitHubHelp: "This browser doesn’t support the FIDO U2F standard yet. We recommend updating to the latest Google Chrome to start using security key devices" is a lie. Firefox 67 does support U2F (I've tested it). Also please stop recommending Google Chrome (it's spyware). Thanks!

“I am altering the deal. Pray I don’t alter it any further.” #authoritarian https://t.co/Heb7cHtFDh

Super ñango 🤪

@mstfacmly The current hoopla is about *real-time* ray tracing. How long did it take you to render a scene back in 1995? 😏 https://t.co/ayYr2aAFfH

Ka-Chow! ⚡️

Infancias destruidas : el Gansito de Marinela no es un ganso - es un pato 😞 https://t.co/D8YKzknbHN

Power balls 💪🏻

RT @jamestait0: I'm looking for my next contract! Available mid-June for #remotework in #python and #freesoftware. See my CV to find out if…

RT @nixcraft: Haha. Poor MS. It went from calling Linux cancer to adopting Linux kernel. Microsoft will ship a full Linux kernel in Windows…

RT @kelseyhightower: I think @Canonical might have assembled the easiest way to provision a single node Kubernetes cluster:

$ snap inst…

“My pet caca 💩” 🤣

RT @silicongirl: 😎 https://t.co/SOsw1jmYgw

Pardon my rusty Latin 😎

YouTube injecting ads for beer in the middle of a children-oriented video but hey - it’s ok because it’s alcohol-free beer 😎🤦🏻‍♂️#deleteyoutube

RT @Val_Plante: En cette Journée mondiale de sensibilisation à l’#autisme, assurons-nous de bâtir des milieux de vie ouverts et inclusifs,…

The ratio of ads to content is now infinite - just found buzzfeed has an endless scrolling pit of ads at the bottom of every article.

@El_Chaco_Veloz Y ya lograron poner el certificado? 🙄

Yay una figura de acción de Diego Luna 🖖🏼 https://t.co/OBtoSgP46A

“Android - the phone OS of my nightmares” 🤭

https://t.co/BEeymi2A0B it was about time. Canada owes nothing to Boeing - the safety of Canadian travellers comes first.

@popmofolk https://t.co/TA6tGRkfAt

@El_Chaco_Veloz Sólo pregúntale si sabe instalar certificados en Windows 🤪

@Tonejito @gitlab @GoHugoIO @jekyllrb @hexojs How about https://t.co/E6Om0DkS97 ?

Spot-on targeting, Google. I can’t read mandarin, you’re just wasting BMO’s advertising dollars 🤣 https://t.co/MduIyho29R

RT @stminfo: [Conditions météo] 🚌⚠️🌨 À partir de 17 h et durant toute la nuit, plus de 40cm de neige sont attendus. Pensez à planifier vos…

The Crumpet Police 🤣

Way to go @YouTube - showing ads for Scotiabank iTrade in the middle of a children’s video. 👍🏻 #YouHadOneJob #targeting #fail

@El_Chaco_Veloz Jaja a que es más chico que tu gato ;)

@El_Chaco_Veloz No le saques chaco! https://t.co/tffusl8PnB

RT @popmofolk: Por esta casa cobran un predial equivalente al de 93 departamentos #cartelinmobiliario

@popmofolk https://t.co/QOWqc7Cvxk https://t.co/hpa53a82uj

“Everybody knows the tyrannosaur is a carnivore - why are you giving him broccoli? Give it to the brachiosaurus instead.” 🦖🦕

@El_Chaco_Veloz Ah no pos así sí 😮👍🏻

@El_Chaco_Veloz Ay Chaco y pa qué tanta pantalla si ya ni te dejan programar 😭😝

@popmofolk Se los mandó diosito para castigarlos porque se canceló el aeropuerto de Texcoco 🤪

RT @amyngyn: COWORKER: we need to find the root cause asap ME: *takes long drag* the root cause is that our processes are not robust enough…

Hay que sacar el fua! 💪🏼 #loqueseproyectahaciaeluniverso https://t.co/ZdWDGTYu7F

Pro tip! https://t.co/8VVPuFkWb5 image search lets you see images full-screen unlike google’s crap 🙌🏼

Peña Nieto es el único líder de un país del G20 que usa trono 🚽😝 https://t.co/InyktLyZpW

It's #GivingTuesday2018 . We donated small amounts (every bit counts!) to @SPCAMontreal , the Canadian Wildlife Federation, @NCC_CNC, @Wikipedia , @letsencrypt , @mozilla.

First hoar frost of the season! #winter https://t.co/A08a4trRPC

@El_Chaco_Veloz 🤗

@A_Aspuru_Guzik @El_Chaco_Veloz No te preocupes ya que caiga la nieve vas a ver mejor 😝

@El_Chaco_Veloz Ah estos sureños 😝 https://t.co/NgcN9JkdWe

@El_Chaco_Veloz 🤤

This is NOT a taco 🚫🌮 https://t.co/K7UsngX7Np

@El_Chaco_Veloz Recuérdales que en otoño les devuelven la hora que fue robada en primavera 👌🏼

“¿Así o más quelite?” 😝

@davidlh @clutterbuck_19 Los egipcios no conocían ni el sistema métrico ni las coordenadas basadas en Greenwich. En el mejor de los casos es una coincidencia increíble. Peor de los casos, es falso 🧐

Where will the cycling path take you today? #Autumn #bikepath https://t.co/50oCj1fodr

How did this clown get elected? 🙄 https://t.co/tanXvFPBqI

- “everybody needs a skeleton” - “Except worms and other invertebrates “ - 🤔

The word “apparatus” has been uttered #mustbeasunday

It has begun 🙄 https://t.co/F2uTuPRTu2 with the notwithstanding clause, the CAQ can use its ”simple majority vote [to] suspend the core rights of the Charter. “

En Quebec tenemos al partido verde y al partido de la verde 😝 https://t.co/a9jDImJ0qV #blocpot

@El_Chaco_Veloz Pero esa foto es de la temporada 2 (who’s the doctor?)

There is an entire subculture of people who empty their pockets, take and share pictures of the contents, and spend their time explaining why they carry each item every day. #wondersOfTheInternet #EDC

@citrix “It’s” 🙄. For god’s sake please if you’re going to spam my timeline with your promoted tweets at least have them proofread.

RT @El_Chaco_Veloz: Desconfío de cualquier cosa que venga de Microsoft y tenga la palabra “inteligente”.

“It’s time to feed the wolf” 🐺

RT @chick_in_kiev: i can well and truly say that most of you have no idea the kind of abhorrent filth that is succeeding wildly on youtube.…

Disney is like a dementor that sucks souls and then pukes out money. 🙄

RT @TheRickWilson: And so began Donald Trump's war against the Snow Mexicans. https://t.co/qeSPnYdHx9

How many engineers does Google have working on UI/UX for Meet? did not a single one of them realize that having the "hang up" button right between the very commonly-used "mute audio" and "stop sending video" controls is idiotic? 🙄

"melon drama" was just mentioned in a conference call. May you live in interesting times and work in an interesting place :)

Tomato drum - or “drumato” 🍅 🥁

RT @aljwhite: so screwed has the gaming of the algorithm become, if you give a 3 year old access to YouTube they will have navigated their…

Have you ever treated a wound with vodka? (Please RT)

@zygoon Their PCI vendor identifier is 0x8086 also https://t.co/GLOgjUUqwT ⌨️

Oh hahaha I just muted a person that claimed journalists are the “truth force”. Not interested in anything else this delusional individual has to say. 💪🏼

RT @popmofolk: "abro hilo" es de lo que más me da molesta leer en twitter

“Oh no! Semicircle fall!” 😱⭕️#toddlerspeak

Hahahahah YouTube wants me to pay $16 a month for the privilege to download videos hahahahahaha 🤣🤣🤣🤣

We’ve been trying to watch broadcast tv for a while. It’s super hard: it has almost as many ads as YouTube. 🙄

RT @VidadePerrosMx: En adopción: Gatito amoroso - https://t.co/EmEkzNnVAw https://t.co/Ya0J7pOsI6

After several decades programming I finally wrote a tool named after a Chuck Norris movie 🤛

Why do sharks have nostrils? 🤔 🦈 #shark

Why on earth would google calendar need 18.6 MB of data? It’s a calendar, should only be syncing small chunks of data, not a list of all events in the world since the birth of Julius Caesar. 🙄 google stop wasting my resources 🙄 https://t.co/8nimv5lfsk

YouTube used to have no ads. Then they put ads at the start of videos, now they come in the *middle* of videos, and more frequently every time. Looks like google is a bit desperate for money?

RT @snapcraftio: .@Opera is now available as a Snap in the Snap Store. https://t.co/E4GDp5lyBD https://t.co/AzUpKILTo5

🤣From https://t.co/mJSEgjRzLQ: "This message does not have authentication information or fails to pass authentication checks". "Fails to pass"? isn't that just "Fails authentication checks" ?? Clearly the guys working on Google's SMTP servers don't english too good.

🙄 https://t.co/aSbd8dZWBp

@silicongirl 🙊

RT @El0bal: Quien no entiende con hechos, no va a entender con argumentos. Por eso hay conservadores.

The word “unfathomable” has been uttered 😎

@silicongirl “Dinos make everything better “ ❤️ 🦖 💕 🦕 💗

“Harry Potter y la Sierra Tarahumara” - “Harry Potter y la pelota azteca” - “Harry Potter y el nagual del destino “ #region4 😸

@silicongirl 😞

Without any tweaks, @ubuntu 18.04 makes my laptop's battery last noticeably longer \o/ great to squeeze more life out of this 4-year-old laptop!

@popmofolk “La cafetera de émbolo explota en elogios luego de la victoria de su equipo nacional” 🤔🤗

“Chaotic roadshow” hahaha great headline CBC news 🤣https://t.co/VaD7LPrwRX

RT @writingben: Let's have something nice today.

Let’s remember that in 1500 BCE, someone in Iran carved a little hedgehog on wheels to gi…

Or this. https://t.co/3FqzkYZkOd

I was going to tweet complaining about this or that. But there are plenty of angry complain tweets around, so I decided to post this instead. #enjoy https://t.co/L3JIiyIXFK

Ontario elected Doug Ford even knowing he probably shared his brother’s penchant for car centricity (remember the “war on the car is over”?). https://t.co/37VLP6U0FX

Muppets genealogy 😏

RT @mattcoyney: When toddlers insist that they can dress themselves. #fuckitwearelate https://t.co/oN44Psx1pX

“It all began with a banana and went downhill from there” 😒🍌

“He was so evil even his right hand was sinister” 🤚 #evil

@silicongirl 😭

¿Cómo se abrevia “nada más”?

@popmofolk Pon unos mosquiteros en las ventanas 😏

@silicongirl 😂🤔😒😓

RT @El_Chaco_Veloz: Oye @Aeromexico En el vuelo 477 de ayer Houston - CDMX nos arrancaron los tags de las maletas. El mío era de Batman y e…

@silicongirl 🤤 #perfectEmoji

@1stvamp @bloodearnest We’re big fans of Nanny Plum :)

@bloodearnest Indeed! A lot of adult-worthy sarcasm, ironies and references. I plan to watch Peppa well into my eighties :) 🐷

@1stvamp Entirely agree 🐽

“El tigre de Santa Julia” https://t.co/j0nngzOJ6z

Those who whined about Peppa Pig creating unrealistic expectations about NHS service times clearly didn’t watch the episode where a house is built from scratch and inspected in 2 days 🤗lighten up, it’s just a cartoon show.

RT @HoarseWisperer: I’d much rather live next door to someone who crossed a desert to become an American than an American who wouldn’t cros…

RT @pangmeli: the fuck are you honking at me for??? you're flying around in a climate controlled invincibility chariot while I'm out here o…

The new “axis”, the axis of evil, is shaping up to be USA-Russia-North Korea. #HistoryRepeatsItself

RT @bIazingxmexican: Avocado farmers in Santa Barbara County are currently struggling to find workers. So to all of the white people who wh…

Apooka wawawawa 😆

Que cuando el gol contra Alemania, tembló de tanto brinco que dieron los aficionados. Ándenle con esa enjundia salgan a votar el 2 de julio 👍🏻 https://t.co/a6k9yQwgtb

La liguilla y la lagartijilla 😜

“No te rasques!” “Sí me rasco y qué”

@gusdetavo @alicedice Los pueden anunciar en https://t.co/l1GwwXAuwD 🐶

The word “sphincter” has been uttered 😱

“More waffle please “

RT @El_Chaco_Veloz: …porque Microsoft es un campeón del Open Source…” ja jaja JaJa JAJA JAJAJAJAJA!!!

RT @El_Chaco_Veloz: A ver si siguen felices cuando tengan que firmarse a su cuenta de Outlook 360 para actualizar la última versión de su d…

Just remember, folks. Microsoft have never been “friends” of free software. Everybody rejoices about them “embracing” open source. They are, indeed. Just remember the two steps that come after that. #stillTheEnemy

@jamesadonner Like this exciting commitment ? https://t.co/2opjSwOHaL

“Trump's actions transferred more than half a billion dollars from the U.S. economy to Canada's since March.” hahahaha thanks Trump! 😂 https://t.co/Xaqos0oqvS

We’ve reached the conclusion that gorillas are difficult to draw 😓🙄 https://t.co/2pfbr2wRIQ

@silicongirl What 🤖

@A_Aspuru_Guzik @ServiceCanada_E Welcome landed immigrant!

“What is a geek?” 🤓

What the hell is a “progressive conservative” party? Sounds like a “carnivorous vegetarian” Party to me. 🙄

RT @JustinTrudeau: American tariffs on Canadian aluminum & steel are unacceptable. As we have said, we will always stand up for our workers…

This is how you respond to a president’s tariff bravado! 👊 https://t.co/2vD5gwBHJM

When there is really nothing on tv - they had nothing to air so they’re actually showing the camera feed from the *radio* station #cbc https://t.co/WL36QOOAek

“Si tú me entiendes y yo te entiendo, ¿para qué nos hacemos los que no nos entendemos? “ 😝

@silicongirl @popmofolk « Un peu de civisme » 😏

RT @dog_feelings: one of the small neighbor humans. was outside. blowing magic rainbow spheres. so of course i went over to investigate. i…

@Plant_id Yes! Impressive speed and accuracy. Thanks! I’ll definitely swing by your site!

Anyone know what kind of plant or tree this is ? 🤔 https://t.co/v4aaBphtUy

RT @ffffffffffound: Encuentre las 7 diferencias. https://t.co/OxZ2oNcm8M

Que chispa que al Bronco lo dejaron poner su apodo en la boleta. Hubieran dejado a AMLO poner “el peje” y a Meade pues quien sabe como le dirán 🤷🏻‍♂️ https://t.co/rrTxb9DLHO

RT @3baal: YES!!! I can finally ditch the other browser from my system again :) @firefox working with google hangouts/meet! https://t.co/3d…

The battle for the lawn #grass https://t.co/fdwf7xRahs

RT @silicongirl: Bike racks at #Provigo #LaSalle completely obstructed by their garden merchandise! @ProvigoQc making your shops friendly a…

@silicongirl I am old and grumpy 😝

Can I somehow filter out all those “by age 35” tweets? It was fun once or twice. By now it’s just annoying and the meme is like 2 weeks old anyway. Face it the time has passed 😛

“We have a visual” 💩

RT @ChloeCondon: Just woke up from a dream where I was doing an expense report for activities in another dream I had. Adulthood is the wors…

RT @samccone: Have a code review culture that's dominated by nitpicks? Chances are that you need to invest in more rigid presubmit checks.…

RT @silicongirl: They have live lobsters at the supermarket. 😭😭😭😭😭

If people’s political views become more conservative as they age, then we’re doomed as current population grows older. Being conservative is not the solution: the world has never been in a good enough situation that we can afford to just remain as we are.

The foliage is back! 🍃 https://t.co/3ieBwpFmBc

RT @ubuntu: Trust and security in the Snap Store https://t.co/nj4VQLORY1 https://t.co/zwERJjmbPe

RT @brianklaas: If there are any Italian to English translators out there, I’m pretty sure the restaurant I’m at in Naples could use your h…

Do you take your phone with you when you go to the bathroom? 🤔

Writers who appear as characters or are mentioned in their own books. Reply with more! Stephen King, Bret Easton Ellis, Chuck Palahniuk, Douglas Coupland...

Brooklyn nine-nine. Another beloved series cancelled by FOX. Why do you guys even bother? Do what I do, preempt the inevitable anguish and don’t start watching any Fox series. Let them go quietly into the night. 🌟

“This is not for babies” 👶🏻

RT @silicongirl: 👏🏽 good news are good! https://t.co/Zq8yarmZMN

@El_Chaco_Veloz En FOX? No tiene caso, hagan lo que hagan lo van a cancelar 😔

Yes there is a code Among pirates 😡

RT @tomgreenleaftec: Why is #LXC so awesome? Easier testing setup and being able to build for dak even though I'm on bionic are my latest t…

This crap appeared at the top of my timeline today. Know what’s missing @Twitter ? A “thanks but i don’t want you spamming all my contacts ever” dismiss button. https://t.co/6DCLYV1lIZ

Looked like some kind of test. Pretty stupid and dangerous to do this over heavily populated LaSalle and Ville-Émard. https://t.co/25OGPotTHG

I had to re add my gmail account to my iPhone because it was borked. Now @Google is emailing, popping messages in all their web pages, begging me “please please we want to be on your iPhone and slurp all your data pleaseeee” - it’s so annoying. 👿

Why is there a (pretty large) airplane circling over angrignon park in #montreal right now ? ✈️🤔 https://t.co/DT74wYtWtv

“your new Apple iPhone doesn't have the latest Google apps” - well, it’s by choice, @gmail. So don’t patronize me ok? 😛

RT @ubuntu: Ubuntu 18.04 LTS is now available! https://t.co/eH49xZbqlp https://t.co/ge1DHhQZ81

Por si quedaba duda que Anaya y Meade representan a lo mismo 😜 #error #EleccionesMexico https://t.co/9lXbRGcC00 https://t.co/cwrTNu3Qyl

Luego del #DebatePresidencial2018 inevitablemente vendrán las declaraciones triunfalistas “fulanito ganó el debate” con la consabida implicación de que todos debemos votar por fulanito. 🙄

Ode to the knees.

“cómo odio a los pitufos” 😤https://t.co/11cvW6peVS

Face it - winter is always coming. It’s just a matter of time scales.

How to “share” a link from the PC to my phone: 1- copy url. 2- paste url in https://t.co/S4asSOPYal. 3- scan onscreen code with phone. 4- done! 🤦🏻‍♂️

Look out the window, what do you see ? I see the houses, I see the trees 🌲 🏠

Gary the God #startrek https://t.co/nVzSICsWXw

RT @Val_Plante: Après un hiver pour le moins rigoureux, il est temps de passer au printemps! Lancement de la 10e saison de @BIXImontreal au…

@popmofolk I know, was just messing with you 😏

@popmofolk A Fawcett? https://t.co/4FLKm8yfMV

Sometimes one letter makes all the difference 🍳

RT @viewfromalake: I never heard of this until I moved to Canada. #tea #wtf https://t.co/v4MX3cpCxU https://t.co/W6B99eYFSu

RT @GirlFromBlupo: Dear Amazon, I bought a toilet seat because I needed one. Necessity, not desire. I do not collect them. I am not a toile…

Another day, another funky ice formation. #isitspringyet #ice https://t.co/f0BPi30vls

“Esto es un asco “ 😏

“Seitan is nasty because it comes from hell” 😝

@JoeTalbott Hahaha 😆

“Geriatric pregnancy “ 😝

I can no longer read @engadget on my phone because they added obnoxious auto playing videos to their front page. #Rude

RT @SpaceforGiants: Protecting elephants by ending #IvoryTrade is not only about saving an endangered species and #endwildlifecrime. It's a…

“People” 😏

These guys are looking for a home #plush #villeemard #lesudouest #mtl https://t.co/ytOYIVMcf8

PayPal sucks but getting your CC data stolen from careless merchants and having it used to ride Ubers sucks more. Hahaha

@A_Aspuru_Guzik @UofT @chemuoft @UofTCompSci @VectorInst @NRCan Welcome to Canada dude 🇨🇦

@El_Chaco_Veloz Ah jajaja cierto! 🤦🏻‍♂️

@El_Chaco_Veloz “Beam me up, Scotty”? 🤔“Elementary, my dear Watson”

RT @popmofolk: Sleep is waaaay too important. Cherish that shit.

RT @acollard: Proud to announce Snap Enterprise Proxy https://t.co/77DSWrX4Vo for @snapcraftio users everywhere

Did you know you can use a twitter poll to gather opinions instead of asking people to RT if they agree/disagree with your point? RT if you didn’t know.

RT @bloodearnest: So true... https://t.co/EUnrgjQaHj

A 3-paragraph news article has 4 advertisements, 2 of which are auto playing video. YouTube inserts 2 commercials into a single 5-minute video. I’m really missing old print and television media. 📺

@El_Chaco_Veloz Clarinetes :) al menos aquí en Canadá siguen existiendo 👍🏻 a ver cuánto aguantan.

@El_Chaco_Veloz “Now hiring”?

Sorry I’m not prince harry 🤴 haha 😆

Made with snail drool 🐌 🤤

Slapping “nautical” in front of distance measurements in miles doesn’t make them any less absurd as measurement units. 😒

Spring equinox is 2 days away, meanwhile ... https://t.co/0biktU3icG

@caio1982 Maybe it’ll turn them into Boris Vallejo style paintings ;)

“El aceite de linaza disuelve pintura. ¿Qué no hará por tu cintura?” 😝

¿El Rogelio Moreno canadiense? 🤔 https://t.co/pIhQqkK4Kp

Daddy’s big tummy 🐷

Uranus was there long before I was born. 🌍

Twitter just injected a “this weird trick” ad about building muscles with some shady product in my timeline. No kidding. What makes them think I care about this? And more importantly - what’s with the shit ads? 😒 https://t.co/PPPHvPyulU

RT @franceculture: L’administration Trump autorise (discrètement) de nouveau l’importation de trophées d’éléphants et de lions... Comment l…

@silicongirl Hello 🤖

RT @silicongirl: I get heebie-jeebies whenever I think about all those bots and programs paying such painstaking attention to my every onli…

RT @SenFeinstein: President Trump is quietly trying to allow African elephant trophies to be imported again. We need to protect these anima…

RT @silicongirl: Having a happy swing at Verdun borough because @SO_MTL takes down every single one of them during winter. Why?

#why #ver…

@popmofolk Se siente chido 😎👍

RT @toddmotto: Decided last night I was gonna learn webpack. 20 minutes later I was googling visa requirements to hawaii and how to become…

RT @Malboury: We moved into new offices, but this wall has been left open for a few weeks now. I knew what I had to do. https://t.co/kRQcqM…

RT @popmofolk: Prepara un texto larguísimo en otro lado para meterlo en un chingo de tuits. Esto es decadencia https://t.co/YMwQMA1tqO

“Quick, to the leekmobile!” 🚘

Airline-style pasta 🍝 ✈️

"You have received this service announcement so we could provide you with essential information about using your Gmail email address." Sorry @gmail but you spamming me with your passive-aggressive promotion of the gmail app is NOT "essential information".

A bunny of love 🐰 ❤️

When I got a new phone I didn’t reinstall google docs or sheets, ridiculous bloated applications which have sucked ever since they got split from the Drive app. And I actually haven’t missed them at all. Good riddance!

@Aeromexico para qué carajos compré mis boletos 3 meses antes y les pagué extra por selección de asientos si a la hora de documentar me dicen que no se pudo y me mandan a hacer cola como si fueran guajoloteros o “amenazan” con cambiarme al al día siguiente. Pésimo servicio. 👿

@mkissiel @YouTube I guess they get away with that crap because they’re pretty much indispensable 😡

“Update available” descriptions for @YouTube iOS are horrendous. Always the same, they can’t bother to craft proper descriptions; something about trash and lawns and nothing about what they actually did and why I should waste my time and bandwidth downloading their crap.

Yes because this is THE defining scene in blade runner 🙄 https://t.co/5KT81RWI6l

@caio1982 Hahaha 🤤

Not my food but 😋 #poachedegg https://t.co/tqVfRdVJJg

Confundir Pyeongchang con Pyongyang es como confundir México 68 con México 86 🙄

Just realized - football 🏈 is so boring, people actually prefer watching the commercials. 🙄

@popmofolk #whatisacomputer https://t.co/SOHTLPO3hc

“Crop yields down for you?” Wow YouTube, spot-on ad targeting 🙄

I get phone calls from all over the world! Niger, Burundi, the Maldives, Barbados, Mauritania. All thanks to phone scammers 🙏🏻

@mstfacmly Do you have it under source control? GitHub? Then delete it. It will remain in history forever mwah ahah

“Cuando estaba cruzando por la marimba lo atropelló una mano de chango” 🤔

@INEMexico esta página https://t.co/ls7ZuUQekm está pésima, con navegador Firefox no se puede borrar/backspace, si me equivoco tengo que empezar todo de nuevo ☹️

@El_Chaco_Veloz 😂

Disposable clothes? 🤔